Holding On

September 19, 2018

Breathing. Something so easy shouldn’t be so difficult! Work was bad today. I was moving way too much. In case anyone was wondering, Anemia sucks. When you go up a flight of stairs, or you’re using all the muscle in your legs to walk and push something, blood rushes to your legs with freshly oxygenated cells for your muscles. Cool, right? No. That means when you’re anemic and don’t have the same volume of blood as the average person, oxygenated blood going anywhere but your heart and lungs causes you to look like a 700 pound person that just tried to run the mile. You’re huffing and puffing and yawning on repeat cause your body is trying to convince you to get more air. You’re out of breath after the most mundane of things. It gets kind of annoying really. That’s how my workday was . My arm feels like jelly, I spat out blood on every break from my gums, and I have an ache in my head that makes me want to crawl into the fetal position and not get up.

I have blood work tomorrow for the Hematologist that’s close to home. He gets the “honor” of checking me for lymphoma because, not sure if I mentioned it already(but I don’t think I did), when the hospital did the brain MRI for my Neurologist, part of my neck managed to get in the picture and they found “Numerous Nonspecific Lymph nodes in the partially imaged neck”. My Neurologist said I would now have to be checked for Lymphoma because I guess there shouldn’t be so many lymph nodes in a persons neck? I don’t know. All I know is I did what any rational person would do and I researched it. Went to WebMD and the Mayo Clinic site to figure out what exactly Lymphoma is and if there was a chance of me having that too. Turns out it’s a cancer of ones Lymph nodes(the infection fighting glands throughout the body). Also turns out, I do have the beginning signs, heck my neck has been a form of swollen for almost ten years. They found nodules in my thyroid gland about a year ago, but never did anything for it or tested to see if that was cancer either. I’m staying positive though. If you google your symptoms, you’ll end up with 4 terminal cancers, 6 highly contagious viruses, and a headache. So for now I’ll wait and see.

I ended up making a Fundraiser to try and come up with the travel money I’ll need for Mayo Clinic Florida, hopefully that takes off soon. It’d be nice to be able to pay bills And see some of the country’s best doctors. But hey, what’s being an adult without financial struggle? Hahaha

Living the Dream… (with full sarcasm)